A word to the unaware: if you're from a Sunbelt State and you ever move up north, lie about where you are from. For the first year, every time you meet people you will be peppered with "OH MAN JUST WAIT UNTIL WINTER ARRIVES GEEZ." Every year after that, you will be peppered with "SO HOW YOU LIKIN' THE WINTER?" It is INCESSANT. For some reason, Northerners can't fathom ever wanting to actually LIVE in the North. Whenever I say "Florida" to someone from Michigan, their eyes light up with an ethereal glint - a mingling of fantasy, jealousy, and disbelief. How? How could you leave behind that utopia of the tropics for this frigid, desolate waste?
Here's how Michiganders see Florida:
And here's how Michiganders see their own state:
Well you know what? I LOVE winter. It's awesomely cold so I get to wear big jackets, snow is beautiful, and there's less people out and about. And beer! Beer is great for the winter. Nothing beats sipping on a big, bad stout while snow falls silently outside and the Grinch plays on TV for the 1 billionth time.
Bell's is rolling out the red carpet a little early with an absolute tide of seasonal beers. I haven't picked up Expedition Stout and Cherry Stout yet, but expect reviews of both of them soon!
Name: Java Stout
Variety: Stout
ABV: 7.5%
Price: ~$15 six pack
Can't say no to a coffee beer! Don't know what it is, but for some reason the combination of bitter beans and roasted beer almost always yields a tasty tastebud-teasing treat.
Pours dark and thick, as expected, with a robust caramel-colored head. Scent is heavily that of coffee with some undertones of chocolate, roasted malts, and alcohol. Taste is primarily of balanced coffee beans with some chocolate undertones. Not as bitter as Perkulator and not as chocolately as Founders Breakfast Stout.
"Even-handed" is the best way to describe this beer. It's very tasty and drinkable, but when it comes to coffee stouts I tend to prefer the really "out-there" variety. But don't take that as a slight, Bell's!
Rating: 8/10 - Pleasingly balanced and bitter, if a bit conventional.
Name: Rye Stout
Variety: Stout
ABV: 6.7%
Price: ~$11 six pack
Why so sad, peasanty old lady/man? Is it because of the famine? Yes, then that would be a cause for sadness. But cheer up! You're a Bell's beer!
Pour is dark with a light tan head. Not as thick or oily as most stouts. Aroma is a general roasted pastiche of bread, rye, and coffee. I don't taste very much rye, honestly, and the beer has an unexpected creamy texture that gives it a slightly weak feeling to me. Good bitter finish, but overall this lacks pizazz.
I was disappointed by this beer, just because I typically like rye beers A LOT. In the end, it feels slightly weaker and conventional than most of Bell's stouts. I'd go with the Kalamazoo Stout any day of the week.
Rating: 7/10 - Far from my favorite, but far from bad. Not Bell's best, but still solid overall.
Name: Winter White Ale
Variety: Belgian White
ABV: 5%
Price: ~$10 six pack
Fun fact: Not every winter beer has to be a stout!
I know! Amazing, right?
The beer pours yellow and cloudy, almost like lemon juice, with a bubbly white head. STRONG aromas of citrus (lemon and orange particularly) with even a little bit of banana, pineapple, spice, and alcohol (despite the low ABV). Flavor is zesty with a nice zing that reminds me of spiced apple cider. Sort of like a winterized version of Oberon, but more flavorful and more satisfying.
Rating: 9/10 - I'll be picking this up again once the snow starts to fall, I can tell you that!
E-mail me at mibeerguy@yahoo.com to berate me for reviewing Bell's too much.
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